Identifying Your Learned Behaviors and Patterns for Dealing with Anger

When it comes to identifying the root cause of anger, it’s important to take a close look at your patterns for dealing with it. 

There are some common patterns that people use to express anger:

1. Using put-downs, complaints, or threats to control yourself or others.
2. Avoiding conflict and choosing not to express your anger to avoid feeling guilty.
3. Using manipulation tactics like the silent treatment or trying to get even.
4. Assuming others are angry at you by projecting your own anger onto them.

What patterns for dealing with anger have you noticed in yourself or those around you? How have those patterns affected your relationships and overall well-being?

I noticed that I’ve experienced all of these patterns before. In my own family, I learned how to deal with anger in different ways at different times. The two most significant ways we learn to express our anger are through our families and what we see in society. Unfortunately, like many people, my family showed me all the wrong ways. And society doesn’t help either; we see so much violent expression of anger in the media that often creates even more reactive anger.

To develop a deeper understanding of the patterns that you may have inherited from your family, you can ask yourself a series of questions. For instance, you can start by reflecting on how the people in your family typically deal with anger. Do they tend to express their anger openly or do they bottle it up? Are they prone to yelling or do they tend to withdraw from conflict? Additionally, you can explore how your mother, father, brothers, and sisters handle anger.

By examining their unique approaches to managing anger, you can gain insight into how your own response to anger may have been shaped by your family environment. You may also want to consider how your family’s cultural background and social context have influenced the way that emotions are expressed and managed within your family unit. By unpacking these complex dynamics, you can begin to unravel the intricate web of patterns that have shaped your emotional landscape.

Luckily, there are ways to express your anger without resorting to harmful actions. You can develop the ability to communicate your needs in an honest and straightforward manner while also taking into account the needs and emotions of those around you. Remember that treating yourself and others with respect is key in managing your anger in a positive way.

One helpful method for managing feelings of anger is through power-centered coaching, which is a technique I use in my Intuitive Healing Sessions. This approach assists in discovering the underlying cause of your anger and creating effective strategies for managing it. It also educates you on how to communicate your needs honestly and respectfully while acknowledging the needs of others. If you’re experiencing difficulty with anger, I recommend booking an Intuitive Healing Session to tap into your intuition and gain guidance towards a more peaceful and empowered way of being.