Last week I talked about fear as a drain on our power. This week I want to talk about another power drain – emotional manipulation – and how you can reclaim your power after experiencing emotional manipulation.
Emotional manipulation looks like a whole bunch of things: passive aggression, social and emotional bullying, constant criticism, raised voices, threats, rumor spreading, deliberate exclusion, making you feel inadequate, distortion of facts, gaslighting, guilt-tripping, withdrawal, silent treatment, withholding, comparison, love-bombing, and more. Read this article for more help recognizing the signs of emotional manipulation.
If you are currently in an abusive situation, please trust your intuition, the best thing you can do is remove yourself from the situation. You deserve better. If you fear immediate physical violence, call 911. If you aren’t in immediate danger and you need to talk or find a place to go, call the National Domestic Abuse Hotline. Get support and find a therapist who can help.
Whether you are still experiencing emotional manipulation or not there are things that you can do right now to reclaim your power.
The effects of emotional manipulation run deep and can affect us for the rest of our lives. When you’ve experienced emotional manipulation it can feel confusing and difficult to trust yourself. Often, anxiety runs high and you may feel ashamed or guilty. If you are someone who was deeply affected by emotional manipulation you may tend to self-isolate; seek approval from others; feel resentful; judge yourself and others; and suffer from depression and anxiety. All these effects are also symptoms of power loss and signs that you need to reclaim your power.
As someone who suffered emotional abuse myself, I’ve experienced all these effects. Being on my healing journey for the last 10 years I’ve learned a lot about reclaiming my power and ceasing to be a victim. I still experience anxiety from time to time and have to check myself from seeking external validation. Overall though, I’m more myself than I’ve ever been and I no longer tolerate emotional manipulation in my life. I know that I’m worth more than that.
Being who you truly are and knowing your worth are the results of reclaiming your power. It was through Reiki, self-reflection, and learning about my unique energy that I have been able to get to an empowered state in my life.
So, how do you get there? How do you reclaim your power?
First, you must realize that you are worth being treated like the Divine being that you are. Someone once said to me we surround ourselves with people who treat us only slightly better than we treat ourselves, I really believe that to be true. When you refuse to stay in manipulative situations, you are choosing to treat yourself better and set a requirement for others to do the same.
Reclaiming your power means accepting what you can and can’t control.
It means letting go of the blame, especially any self-blame. Realize that you can’t control the person’s actions or help them to become better. Accept that that isn’t your responsibility. Take responsibility for the part you play, that means taking actions that honor your worth and not feeling guilty for what happened in the past. If you need to forgive yourself, do it and then choose to treat yourself better.
Allow yourself to receive support on your journey.
When we’ve surrounded ourselves with people who bring us down constantly, we need to then find people who are going to treat us with love and respect. That includes finding a team to support you on your healing journey. You don’t have to go it alone. Allowing yourself to receive is one of the most powerful things you can do.
Make self-love a daily practice.
For me, that is my daily Reiki and spiritual practice; honoring my body and intuition; and checking in with my Spirit support team for guidance.
How do the effects of emotional manipulation reflect in your business?
You might not trust your intuition when it comes to making decisions in your business. You might feel always on edge and not trust your business’s ability to support you. You might seek external validation from your clients or colleagues. You might struggle to charge what you are worth. Just like our relationships, your business is a reflection of your internal state and these effects are signs that you need to reclaim your power within your business.
I have a team of Empowered Intuitives that are waiting for you to join us on this journey. You don’t need to feel empowered to join. We’re there to support you in reclaiming your power. Join us for our next virtual circle. Grab your spot and take the next step in reclaiming your power.
Love and light,
Reiki Master Teacher & Spiritual Business Coach